It has been 5 days since we got off of a plane back here in Texas. It seems like an eternity. Every day I think about what Stasik is doing. Has he digressed and gone back to the child we saw the first day or is he full of life like he was when we left? They say that children go through a mourning stage when people they spend time with disappear. I hope he knows that we are coming back for him and that we will be there soon. I hope that the orphanage is taking care of him. I hope that he is warm at night. I hope he is getting enough to eat. These are thoughts that pop into my head every day.
People that have not adopted may not understand what our family is going through right now. For those that have kids, imagine leaving your newborns at the hospital and just coming back to get them in 12 days. That is how we feel! We have no way to check on him daily and not knowing is the worst. We have a hard time sleeping and getting through the day because we worry so much about him. We feel about Stasik like we did Carter the day he was born. I was not sure how I would feel when I finally met him and held him, but it is no different. You feel the same love, the same commitment, and the same joy as you do when you give birth to a child.
Right now I wonder what his birth parents are feeling. They have been contacted and told that Stasik will be adopted. I am assuming that they have not filed to reclaim parental rights. I am happy, but also very sad. I am sad because of the decisions his birth parents are making and have already made; the choice to offer their child a better life or to just make theirs easier. Only they know their reasons and I hope they are at peace with their decision now either way. I am happy because now Stasik will know what it means to be loved and cherished like every child should. We did not give birth to him, but he is our son; he is Carter's brother, a grandson, a cousin, a nephew, and a family member to everyone that is going through this with us. He will be blessed just as we are blessed; he will be lifted up just as we have been.
We thank God everyday for the support we have received; kind words of encouragement and prayers. We have friends and family that have taken time out of their lives to take care of Carter and place our minds at ease. Others have helped raise or donated money to ease the financial burden. One of our best friends will get on a flight to the Ukraine with Debbie so she does not have to handle everything alone and I can stay home and take care of things here. Oh we are blessed beyond measure to have the friends and family we have. These same people, this village we live in, will be the ones that help raise Stasik just as they have raised Carter. They will love him as we do and that time is coming soon....the wait is almost over!