Today we had our best day yet! When we arrived at the orphanage, the nannies already had Stasik ready to go. He was dressed in his same light blue jacket he normally wears. As usual, it was over two other layers of clothes. Little did he know that we bought him a brand new outfit last night. When they carried him to us he was very anxious and reached out for us. It made us feel so good that he seemed to look forward to this part of his day as much as we did. We asked the nanny if we could change his clothes and after we were given the ok we headed upstairs to our playroom where we go every day.
Now blue is the signature color for the Wingfield men, but even I know you can’t wear the same thing every day. Last night Mama bought him a green suit that has bears on the top and a hat with ears. It is a 3-6 month outfit and we hoped it would fit him. It was a perfect fit, but only with the other two layers on. After our quick change we pulled out all of the toys like we normally do. For the first time since we arrived he seemed content from the beginning of our visit. There was no apprehension and he seemed to understand what was going on and that these short periods were all we had, but were only temporary.
Today he did not have the reflux he has had the last 5 days. It was obvious to us that the doctor had followed our request to limit the big particles of food he has been eating. We are very appreciative to her for that and believe that he will be able to digest the smaller bites easier. He only spit up a couple of times the entire afternoon.
Today he just seemed to want to be held and be in our laps. Usually we play on the ground and do some physical therapy exercises, but today he just wanted us to hold him. We had no problem with that and took every opportunity to accommodate him. He seemed a lot more tired today and we wonder if our visits have somehow affected his sleep schedule. Or maybe he is just like us and can’t sleep waiting for the next visit. The time just seemed to fly by and after about an hour and a half, he just fell asleep in our arms. He was completely at peace and it was the most beautiful thing for us to see. It was as normal as it could be in our situation and it just killed us to have to take him back to his group. We wanted to stay with him all day.
Unfortunately, we had to take him back and upon arriving downstairs, he woke up. The nannies took him and he held on to Debbie’s jacket until his outstretched arms just could not anymore. For the first time ever he raised his little arm and waved good bye to his new Mama. The nannies looked at one another as if they were in disbelief. Maybe it was the first time he had ever shown that kind of emotion, or maybe they just could not believe the bond that had been developed in such a short time. Regardless of the reason, we were so happy…..and so sad at the same time. We wanted to ask for more time, but knew it was just not a possibility. We both kissed him goodbye and he never took his eyes off of us. They placed him in a walker to play with the rest of the group. The walker was turned away from us, but he turned his head all the way around to make sure we were still there. His positioning looked so uncomfortable, but it was obvious he did not care. The nanny tried to get his attention, but he was steadfast. Finally, she turned the walker around and he just stared at us with those beautiful bluish gray eyes. I told him, “z’avtra”, “tomorrow” and he smiled as if to let me know he understood. We backed out of the room, took one last glance and then, very hesitantly, walked away.